Month: March 2022

One of the modalities I use within humanistic counselling is Transactional Analysis. This is a highly structured yet very accessible form of therapy that is designed to explore your personality, how this has been shaped by experience (particularly in childhood), and what this means in the context of issues like depression, anxiety, or other trauma-related problems. It has been shown to have a number of benefits, and this blog post walks you through three of them.

Structure Your Life Script

An important part of transactional analysis is mapping out your ‘life script’. This is formed by experiences from childhood that laid the foundation for how we think about ourselves. If your parents were stressed workaholics, for example, you may believe that you are not loveable and must always please others so that they will need you. These beliefs continue into adulthood and lead to the same problems occurring in our relationships and how we feel about ourselves. Transactional analysis allows us to look at this internal process and understand why our script developed in the way it did, ahead of using techniques to challenge and change our daily thinking patterns and replace them with new ones.

Be Kinder To Yourself

By giving clients the space to understand their life script and the internal processes that lead to certain ways of perceiving themselves, I encourage an atmosphere of kindness to oneself. Transactional analysis illuminates the extent to which we are mean to ourselves, along with the impact this has on our behaviour, emotions, and relationships with others. Having this knowledge about ourselves gives us greater autonomy over how we think, rather than simply accepting your unconscious thought patterns as inevitable.

Communicate Better

Transactional analysis claims that we have three separate ego states – parent, adult, and child. If one person is acting from an adult state and another person from a child state, communication can break down and cause issues between the two people. These ‘transactions’ happen all the time, often ending in a similarly negative way. Transactional analysis helps people become more mindful of their different ego states, enabling them to flow between them more freely understanding their influence on others. Over time, this will lead to more transparent, honest, fulfilling communication with others and, by extension, better relationships.

If you are interested in learning more about transactional analysis, or other forms of humanistic counselling in Basingstoke, Newbury, and online, feel free to get in touch with me at any time. I’d be happy to answer any questions you may have.

As a counsellor working in Basingstoke, Hampshire I understand that many people are feeling a range of emotions as the world embraces our ‘new normal’ following two years of lockdowns and COVID-19 restrictions. After such a long period of time, during which we have adjusted to a certain way of life, how do we navigate this different landscape? Naturally this question brings up some difficult feelings, and I am here to help you walk through them.

The first thing to keep in mind is that you are not alone in how you are feeling. So many people I speak with are anxious or worried about ‘returning to the world’,. Big social occasions, or even going inside a crowded shop or pub, can feel scary, which is only natural after these activities were taken away from us for so long. I am here to help you process these feelings and develop techniques for managing them as you navigate certain life situations that you may find stressful.

Another feeling that you may have is a sense of anger at a lack of control in your life. For so long, we were all instructed by the government to remain indoors – instructions most of us followed very closely. Now that we have been given freedom to go outside, all of a sudden many find themselves now being told what to do by their boss, namely return to the office, for no clearly viable reason. It is perfectly natural to feel angry at the lack of control you have over these decisions, and how they affect your wellbeing and pattern of life.

You may not want to go back to the office, or attend large social gatherings, yet there feels like there is enormous pressure to do so – from friends, from government figures, from your work. Amid all these forces, it can be hard to remain close to how you feel within yourself – what you really want.

If you are experiencing this kind of issue, or any problems relating to the ‘new normal’, from depression to anxiety to anger, I offer a safe, confidential, non-judgemental space to talk them through with humanistic counselling in Basingstoke, Newbury, and online. I am here to give you that space where you can express your honest feelings in a way that makes sense to you. Feel free to get in touch with me at any time.