Starting school for the first time, or going back after a long break, can feel like a lot. For children, it might bring a mix of excitement, nerves, fear, or sadness. They may be adjusting to new routines, new teachers and classmates, and the pressures that come with learning and social life.

For parents, it can be equally emotional. You might feel anxious about how your child will cope, or even guilty if they had a difficult time during the pandemic, such as illness, loss, isolation, or financial stress. If any of this feels familiar, please know you’re not alone.

Below are a few simple, warm ways you can support your child’s transition while also caring for yourself.

 1) Talk about feelings, early

One of the best things you can do is start talking about school before it begins. Try asking open questions, such as:

- How do you feel about starting school or going back?

- What are you most looking forward to?

- What might be different this time?

- How can I help?

When your child shares, listen properly and reflect what you hear. For example:

- “I can see you’re feeling nervous.”

- “It makes sense that you feel a bit worried.”

- “You’re allowed to have mixed feelings.”

Try to avoid dismissing their feelings, even when you’re trying to reassure them. Phrases like “Don’t be silly” or “You’ll be fine” can sometimes leave children feeling unheard. Instead, aim for empathy first, reassurance second.

2) Help them manage worries

If your child tells you they’re worried, take it seriously and help them make sense of it. You can try:

- Exploring the worry: “What makes you feel worried?” “When does it show up most?” “What does it make you feel like doing?”

- Challenging unhelpful thoughts gently: “Is that worry definitely true?” “What evidence is there?” “What else could be true?”

- Practising coping tools: deep breathing, mindfulness, relaxing muscle exercises, or simple “worry time” routines. The key is to practise when things are calm, so they’re easier to use when anxiety rises.

And don’t forget to celebrate small wins. Even coping with a first-day routine, settling in after lunch, or making one new friend is progress.

3) Remember: you’re supporting two people

Going back to school is a big shift for children, but it can be a big shift for parents too. Give yourself permission to find it tricky. Your child’s adjustment can take time, and it often looks different from one day to the next.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed or your child’s anxiety feels persistent, it can really help to have extra support.

Support available

If you’re finding the transition difficult and would like support through counselling, you can contact me by email or call 07941 518808. I offer a safe space to talk through what’s going on, and we can explore practical strategies to help you and your child feel more settled and confident.